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LIFE IS WEIRD; PERSPECTIVELY
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LIFE IS WEIRD; PERSPECTIVELY

11

Jul 25, 2023, 7:52 AM

So my therapist said that I should try doing something romantic; like making breakfast in bed…. So, I took her advice and tried making breakfast in bed for some chick. Then the dumb chick that I cooked breakfast for had to make it all awkward by asking dumb questions like, “who are you, and how did you get in my house?!” The nerve of some people, right?

Like, just the other day whenever I donated one kidney, the whole town hailed me as a hero, but as soon as I donated nine more kidneys I’m suddenly subjected to a criminal investigation.

It’s all good though because I’m a grateful person unlike most people. For instance, I have this friend who gets laid three times a day, gets to go to the gym twice a day, and even has enough spare time to read two books per month. Yet, that jerk still complains about being in prison.

At the end of the day, I’m still grateful for everything I have. I’m a simple man and I’m not looking for too much. I just want a woman who looks at me like Joe Biden looks at an empty auditorium and ask, “hey who s**t my pants?”


GO TIGERS!

( COULD NOT WAIT UNTIL FRIDAY) HAVE A GREAT WEEK Y’ALL

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Our country won't go on forever, if we stay soft as we are now. There won't be any America because some foreign soldiery will invade us and take our women and breed a hardier race.

~Chesty Puller
Lt.General United States Marine Corps


Re: LIFE IS WEIRD; PERSPECTIVELY

4
Jul 25, 2023, 8:05 AM

I tried making breakfast in bed, but the sheets caught on fire so never again.

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Re: LIFE IS WEIRD; PERSPECTIVELY

2
Jul 25, 2023, 8:59 AM

If you have any more kidneys you're willing to donate just shoot me a t-mail. I'm a serial black market organ merchant in my spare time.

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