"I shot a werewolf once, but by the time I got to it, it had turned back into my neighbor?s dog"

Chuck Norris' calendar goes from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Chuck!
MCHammer found out the hard way, Chuck Norris can touch it!

"Brasky's family crest is a picture of a barracuda eating Neil Armstrong."

"My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe."