Replies: 78
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Oculus Spirit [79508]
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On average, how long does it take your wife or girlfriend
Mar 14, 2016, 12:40 PM
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to get ready to go somewhere? Could be anything from running to the store, to going out to eat.
I've recently concluded my personal study, and have found that on average, it takes us (by us, I mean her) at the very least 25 minutes, and that is just to run out and grab some fast food or something. Going to the lake or going out to eat I can count on her taking an hour. Most of the time, I'm waiting 35+ minutes. 35 minutes is if I'm really pushing her to move, otherwise I can go ahead and factor in 10-15 more minutes. Which is usually the case, because she gets pissed off when I start trying to get her moving, but I get pissed off having to wait.
Just wanted to get a feel for how common this is, I'm thinking about abandoning her on the weekend mornings so I can get the boat in before lunch.
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CU Medallion [54759]
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the feels are overwhelming me***
Mar 14, 2016, 12:42 PM
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Oculus Spirit [79508]
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Approx. what % of the time to y'all get in the car
Mar 14, 2016, 1:00 PM
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and she realizes she's somehow forgotten something, despite having a large, toolbox like pocket book?
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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Happens pretty rarely.
Mar 14, 2016, 1:02 PM
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Although, she will have to go back in the house for something after I've locked the door and we're in the garage.
But I'm just playing semantics.
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Oculus Spirit [79508]
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"Do you have your keys? Of course you don't"
Mar 14, 2016, 1:04 PM
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Them feels.
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Heisman Winner [105934]
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Wait, did I unplug the straightener?***
Mar 14, 2016, 1:06 PM
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CU Medallion [54759]
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"open the garage door if you're gonna sit here idling"***
Mar 14, 2016, 1:08 PM
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Oculus Spirit [79508]
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Lawd yes, heard that one a few times
Mar 14, 2016, 1:09 PM
[ in reply to Wait, did I unplug the straightener?*** ] |
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And that straightener is the ####### devil. Not only is the cord constantly in my way, that POS stays hot for a very long time. Had a close call with my penor when I accidentally caught that god forsaken cord and knocked it off of the vanity while standing there naked.
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CU Medallion [66358]
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"Had a close call with my penor"
Mar 14, 2016, 1:13 PM
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d00d, that's when that #### goes in the trash
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Oculus Spirit [79508]
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If contact would have been made, it would have been the
Mar 14, 2016, 1:22 PM
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end of that straightener. I get fussed at for leaving empty beer cans on the counter, at least those won't burn anybody.
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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Hope your God foreskin was okay.***
Mar 14, 2016, 1:23 PM
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Oculus Spirit [79508]
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It was taken from me without consent long ago***
Mar 14, 2016, 1:24 PM
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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I see this as a benefit to you during those hot muggy
Mar 14, 2016, 1:26 PM
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summer days in Clover.
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Oculus Spirit [75902]
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Wait, why is Lakebum in Clover?***
Mar 14, 2016, 1:27 PM
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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Just assumed from his neighbor stories, and how he
Mar 14, 2016, 1:29 PM
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describes that piece of land his double wide sits on.
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Oculus Spirit [79508]
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Heisman Winner [105934]
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Joined: 12/2/02
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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He was going as Yao Ming for halloween.***
Mar 14, 2016, 1:24 PM
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Oculus Spirit [82021]
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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Is there not a way to make the driver's seat of a car
Mar 14, 2016, 12:42 PM
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look like a dish washer or oven or something, so that she can just meet you there when she's ready?
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110%er [5887]
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Re: On average, how long does it take your wife or girlfriend
Mar 14, 2016, 12:43 PM
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I'M HURRYING!!!
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Oculus Spirit [79508]
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yeah but you've already taken 30 minutes
Mar 14, 2016, 12:46 PM
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This is said quite frequently in my house.
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110%er [5887]
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Re: yeah but you've already taken 30 minutes
Mar 14, 2016, 1:00 PM
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The sweetest and most fragile of voices can sound like nails on a chalkboard when it includes those words. I'll hear it twice before I start obnoxiously rattling the keys.
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Oculus Spirit [82021]
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Oculus Spirit [75902]
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I once bitched about how long it took an Aero lady to get
Mar 14, 2016, 12:45 PM
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ready. The next time I saw her she made me watch her put make up on. Since I wanted to have sex that night, I obliged. She wasn't too happy when I said I could't tell a difference and less happy when I didn't pay attention to her new bra. We stopped banging for a year or so after that night.
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All-In [38514]
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I don't have this issue.
Mar 14, 2016, 12:46 PM
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My wife gets ready quickly. She can take a shower, get dressed, dry her hair, and put on makeup in under 15 minutes. For a quick errand or fast food it's slipping on shoes, so less than a minute.
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Oculus Spirit [82021]
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Noob, she's not washing her hair if it's 15min.
Mar 14, 2016, 12:47 PM
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Or your wife has a pixie cut.
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All-In [38514]
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My wife is capable of completing simple tasks efficiently.***
Mar 14, 2016, 12:50 PM
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Heisman Winner [138357]
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If I'm understanding you correctly, your wife is
Mar 14, 2016, 1:06 PM
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a dude.
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All-In [38514]
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Yes
Mar 14, 2016, 1:08 PM
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Except she has ##### and a ######.
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Heisman Winner [138357]
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Pics or she has a peanus.***
Mar 14, 2016, 1:12 PM
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All-In [38514]
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Is the Search not working here again?***
Mar 14, 2016, 1:47 PM
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CU Medallion [54759]
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again??
Mar 14, 2016, 2:58 PM
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P.O.T.T.
E.R.
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Oculus Spirit [85963]
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10 minutes to go somewhere random
Mar 14, 2016, 12:47 PM
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and 45 minutes if she has to shower and fix her hair. 47 minutes if I shower with her. To her credit, she does have the most beautiful hair in all of Belton.
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110%er [7980]
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From getting out of bed to leaving, a hair over an hour
Mar 14, 2016, 12:48 PM
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going to the store or going out to eat....anywhere from 1 min to 10 mins depending on if she needs to change and go to the bathroom.
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Oculus Spirit [79508]
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This is what I haven't figured out yet
Mar 14, 2016, 12:54 PM
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We can have just gotten home from work, no changing necessary, yet it will still take ~ 20-30 minutes before we can leave.
Back in the day, I could have woken up, showered, been dressed and in the car within 15 minutes.
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Heisman Winner [105934]
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If she is really into it, just a couple of minutes.***
Mar 14, 2016, 12:49 PM
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Heisman Winner [105934]
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Oops, I only read the thread title.***
Mar 14, 2016, 12:50 PM
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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If that were true, wouldn't you have typed
Mar 14, 2016, 12:51 PM
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"It doesn't matter"?
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Heisman Winner [105934]
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I'm a tender, caring, lover, just ask Rneerg***
Mar 14, 2016, 12:52 PM
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All-In [45047]
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Re: On average, how long does it take your wife or girlfriend
Mar 14, 2016, 12:50 PM
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7
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All-In [38514]
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inches?***
Mar 14, 2016, 12:53 PM
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All-In [46906]
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Gotta learn how to manipulate a woman
Mar 14, 2016, 12:59 PM
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I know it takes her 1 hour to shower, dress, hair, makeup, get my daughter ready. Therefore, if we have to be somewhere at 6 I tell her we have to be there at 5.
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Heisman Winner [105934]
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What do you during that hour? You don't get kid ready?***
Mar 14, 2016, 1:01 PM
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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Drink.***
Mar 14, 2016, 1:04 PM
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Heisman Winner [105934]
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This is the problem with them taking a while. Daddy drinks
Mar 14, 2016, 1:05 PM
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and gets the kids ready, then by the time we leave, Daddy needs momma to drive.
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Heisman Winner [138357]
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I've read this 4 times,
Mar 14, 2016, 1:07 PM
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and I haven't found the problem yet.
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CU Medallion [66358]
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Hel1, I'm going to start doing that myself***
Mar 14, 2016, 1:09 PM
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Heisman Winner [105934]
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Joined: 12/2/02
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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Then daddy decides it's time to "Keep it real" during
Mar 14, 2016, 1:25 PM
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the 35 minute drive over to the restaurant, and we end up getting drive through. Again.
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Orange Blooded [3148]
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These feelz
Mar 14, 2016, 3:43 PM
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minus the daddy part
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All-In [46906]
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Re: What do you during that hour? You don't get kid ready?***
Mar 14, 2016, 1:22 PM
[ in reply to What do you during that hour? You don't get kid ready?*** ] |
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I gave up trying to dress her after 1. I would put her in clothes. My wife would come in say it was all wrong and change her again. She can deal with that.
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Heisman Winner [138357]
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Like, going out to eat somewhere decent?
Mar 14, 2016, 1:02 PM
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90 minutes minimum. And if we have a reservation, or we're meeting somebody at a particular time, we are late. Every. Single. Time.
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Oculus Spirit [79508]
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Sounds like you may have it worse than me
Mar 14, 2016, 1:11 PM
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I think I'd be leaving at the 90 minute mark whether she was ready or not.
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Heisman Winner [112232]
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Re: On average, how long does it take your wife or girlfriend
Mar 14, 2016, 1:11 PM
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the ugly ones take about 25 minutes.
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All-In [46906]
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Re: On average, how long does it take your wife or girlfriend
Mar 14, 2016, 1:23 PM
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^^^^^ experience.
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Hall of Famer [21349]
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Herself, not long... kids add time.
Mar 14, 2016, 1:25 PM
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But usually less than five minutes if just us when we go somehwere. Now the part about door locked, car backing out of driveway... 'wait a sec'. Nearly every time.
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Heisman Winner [105934]
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I'm calling bullsh!t on wife getting ready in 5 minutes.
Mar 14, 2016, 1:34 PM
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Unpossible. I can't get ready in 5 minutes.
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All-In [45047]
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Depends on how many of the train cars have already left
Mar 14, 2016, 1:37 PM
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the station.
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Hall of Famer [21349]
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I guess I should thro a caveat in their.
Mar 14, 2016, 2:59 PM
[ in reply to I'm calling bullsh!t on wife getting ready in 5 minutes. ] |
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This was assuming a typical night where she has already showered and we just decided to go somewhere. Not a we wake up in the morning and are trying to go somewhere.
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All-In [49309]
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don't abandon her on the weekends until after you
Mar 14, 2016, 1:27 PM
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"get the boat in" before lunch. HTH
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All-TigerNet [12270]
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just like with everything else, sav82wife is waiting on me
Mar 14, 2016, 1:52 PM
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to go.
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All-In [29076]
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Lady of ST is not bad.
Mar 14, 2016, 2:38 PM
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I'd say her average is in the 15-20 minute range. Quick runs for food or something where we may not leave the car she can be ready in 2-5 minutes. Dress up events 30-35. Normal days maybe 15.
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Heisman Winner [105934]
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including a shower? Is she bald?
Mar 14, 2016, 2:39 PM
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on her head?
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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Don't spoon feed him. Let him answer how he wants.***
Mar 14, 2016, 2:45 PM
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All-In [29076]
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Heisman Winner [105934]
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what about her head?***
Mar 14, 2016, 2:54 PM
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Hall of Famer [21594]
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Re: On average, how long does it take your wife or girlfriend
Mar 14, 2016, 3:14 PM
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Buy a PS4 and play Call of Duty while she's getting ready....maybe drink some beers too. Then who gives a shat what she's doing.
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CU Medallion [60261]
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Joined: 11/30/98
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pro tip - if you ever find a low maintenance gal, keep her
Mar 14, 2016, 3:50 PM
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using any available tactics and resources.
Because there's only, like, 30 of them in the whole world.
I had one and stupidly pushed her away, and it is the biggest regret in my life.
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Oculus Spirit [79508]
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Joined: 10/30/05
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Mine isn't high maintenance by any stretch of the
Mar 14, 2016, 4:00 PM
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imagination. I don't have to dress up in a tux and go to fancy parties that aren't any fun so she can keep up with the Jones's, nor do I have to have photoshoots by abandoned barns, or any crap like that.
It's just that she takes forever to get ready to do anything. And going to the grocery store with her can be agonizing.
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CU Medallion [60261]
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Joined: 11/30/98
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I had one like that one time
Mar 14, 2016, 4:12 PM
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I used to intentionally LIE to her and tell her the 8pm movie started at 7 so we still had a slight chance to make it. I'm a OCD-like punctual person and freak out if I am late to anything, even something as unimportant as a movie. Tried - can't help it, or cure it.
So me and the terminally-late woman cannot possibly survive together.
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Heisman Winner [135943]
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Joined: 12/6/98
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Got one.
Mar 14, 2016, 4:23 PM
[ in reply to pro tip - if you ever find a low maintenance gal, keep her ] |
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Low maintenance, always ready to go somewhere before I am, has no problem at all shuttling around drunken RH Tig, Joonyer, and aero to concerts because she rarely drinks. Doesn't care about football, so she's more than happy for me run off to Clemson for the weekend (she knew full well what she was marrying into), but loves baseball and is always looking see a game anywhere we travel. She did shuttle drunken Tig, Joonyer, and aero to the hockey game in Charlotte weekend before last, and she will go see midget wrestling or roller derby anytime I want to go. She hates shopping, has no desire to spend money, and is happy staying home on Friday nights to watch the Amazing Race while I go play LOUD rock and roll. Comes from an awesome family that I enjoy spending time with.
Brother, I'll shout it from the mountaintops...I got the ONLY one there is like THAT, I'm pretty sure.
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Heisman Winner [135943]
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Further...
Mar 14, 2016, 4:27 PM
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it's not like she's dumb and I'm putting anything past her. She's a brilliant woman that graduated with a 3.9 double major undergrad, a 4.0 in her masters, teaches high school and taught college, and is a published author.
One. Of. A. Kind.
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Legend [17753]
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Is this how you met?
Mar 14, 2016, 4:35 PM
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?
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Heisman Winner [135943]
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No.
Mar 14, 2016, 4:39 PM
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I would have made a miniature bass.
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Legend [17753]
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And then asked for a twelve inch Oteil?***
Mar 14, 2016, 4:43 PM
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Heisman Winner [135943]
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DANG RIGHT.
Mar 14, 2016, 4:46 PM
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Took Joonyer to see the Oteil Burbridge Band in Charlotte when Joonyer first started playing bass. It was a mid-week show and we stood 5 feet from him at the Neighborhood Theater in NoDa.
Wow...just, wow.
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CU Medallion [50635]
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do you need another son***
Mar 14, 2016, 5:22 PM
[ in reply to Further... ] |
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All-TigerNet [12763]
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Joined: 10/16/00
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Not long. She looks good with no makeup so
Mar 14, 2016, 8:17 PM
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If she has too, she'll pull her hair back and go.
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Replies: 78
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